South Park season 13 aired from March to November of 2009. Following are episode descriptions for season 13.
The Ring
March 11, 2009
Thinking it's his way into her heart and other body parts, Kenny takes his new girlfriend to a Jonas Brothers concert. His dream of taking their relationship to the next level is crushed when the Jonas Brothers give them purity rings.
The Coon
March 18, 2009
"The Coon" rises from the trash and takes his place as a lone vigilante who wipes out crime in the town of South Park. A rival superhero appears on the scene in the form of "Mysterion" and challenges "The Coon's" place as a symbol for the town.
Margaritaville
March 25, 2009
Randy steps forward with a solution to fix the desperate financial state everyone finds themselves in. The town gets behind him and everyone starts to live a life that no longer depends on any economy at all. Meanwhile, an unlikely savior makes the ultimate sacrifice to solve everyone's problems.
Eat, Pray, Queef
April 1, 2009
Someone played an April Fools joke on the boys and it didn't go over well. Butters is incapacitated, Cartman is furious and the rest of the boys are afraid someone might do it again.
Fishsticks
April 8, 2009
Cartman decides to help Jimmy with his comedy routine. Everyone loves the new joke they come up with. The joke starts to take off and it even hits all the late-night talk shows. The boys are thrilled with how popular it's become until somebody tries to take all the credit.
Pinewood Derby
April 15, 2009
Randy is determined that Stan will win this year's Pinewood Derby. He comes up with a plan that will assure Stan a first place trophy.
Fatbeard
April 22, 2009
Butters and a small group of recruits join Cartman in his dream of living on Skull Island where they will frolic in crystal clear waterfalls and discover buried treasure. Cartman promises that paradise awaits, if they can just get to Somalia.
Dead Celebrities
October 7, 2009
The boys bring in professional ghost hunters to investigate evidence of paranormal activity in the Broflovski house when powerful forces are tormenting Ike. He's freaked out and the stress could kill him. Kyle and the boys are doing everything they can to save him, but the poltergeists won't leave Ike alone.
Butters' Bottom Bitch
October 14, 2009
Butters has made it all the way to the fourth grade without ever kissing a girl. All of his friends have been teasing him mercilessly. Butters is determined to catch up with the rest of the boys in his class. Meanwhile, one overly dedicated cop wages war on prostitution in South Park.
W.T.F.
October 21, 2009
After attending a WWE match the South Park boys have found their new calling in life and they hurry to sign up for the wrestling club. But they soon find out the kind of wrestling they teach at school is not the same thing they saw at the WWE.
Whale Whores
October 28, 2009
The Japanese terrorize aquariums and sea parks across the country. Stan tries to rally the boys to his cause and joins the Whale Wars crew.
The F Word
November 4, 2009
Everyone agrees they've had enough of the loud and obnoxious bikers that have arrived in South Park. The boys are taking on the Harley riders. They thrown down the "F word" and the game is on.
Dances with Smurfs
November 11, 2009
Eric Cartman seizes the opportunity to become the voice of change at the school when he takes over the morning announcements. His target is South Park Elementary's Student Body President, Wendy Testaburger. Cartman is asking the tough questions and gaining followers.
Pee
November 28, 2009
Things at the water park are not what they seem. The boys' fun-filled day is about to turn deadly. Events are in play at Splash Town that signal the end of the world is upon us. Cartman tries to warn everyone, but no one will listen. Disaster is about to strike and the boys are in a race to survive.
