Stan's determined to send a reluctant Steve to summer camp. The only one he finds is in Africa, and it's a refugee camp. Back in Langley Falls, Francine and Roger pretend to be a married couple at events around town, but they can't agree on their backstory. Guest star Thandie Newton.
"The American Dad After School Special"
When Steve falls for an overweight girl, the appearance-obsessed Stan is so appalled by the way she looks that he becomes anorexic. Roger, however, falls for her, too, and attempts to sabotage her relationship with Steve. Guest voices include Lizzy Caplan and Patrick Stewart.
"Failure Is Not a Factory-Installed Option"
Stan loses his self-confidence after an auto salesman keeps getting him to buy cars he doesn't want, and he leaves the family in shame to find himself. Soon all are mired in poverty, but Steve finds a use for the cars. Meanwhile, a veteran police detective (voice of Beau Bridges) picks up an odd, if valuable, piece of evidence that turns out to be a hot poker. Other voices include Swoosie Kurtz, Christine Baranski, Patrick Stewart and Elias Koteas.
"Lincoln Lover"
Stan wants to speak at the Republican National Convention, but the only GOP group that wants him to speak is the gay contingent. So Stan goes with the flow.
"Dungeons and Wagons"
Francine tells Stan she's bored with him, so he takes up drag racing. This provides her with all the excitement she can handle, and then some. And Hayley dumps her clingy boyfriend, Jeff, who soon becomes obsessed with Steve's computer-game universe. This makes Hayley jealous.
"Iced, Iced Babies"
After Steve "breaks up" with her, Francine decides she wants another child, but getting Stan to agree won't be easy. And Roger lies his way into a teaching post at Goff Community College. Hayley is embarrassed, but the cute guy (voice of Elijah Wood) who won't give her the time of day finds him "inspiring."
"Of Ice and Men"
Stan is a passionate figure skater. Who knew? Not Francine, because he never told her. But she finds out and decides to become his partner. Trouble is, she might not be good enough. Meanwhile, Steve and his friends order binoculars from Russia and get a mail-order bride instead.
"Irregarding Steve"
Steve and Roger run away from home to make their fortunes in New York City (Steve as a TV writer; Roger in the stock market). They feel stifled living under the same roof as Stan and putting up with his "plebeian rodent brain," as Steve haughtily puts it. Jon Stewart has a voice cameo as himself.
"The Best Christmas Story Never"
A disconsolate Stan, upset because of a legal injunction against lighting Langley Falls' Christmas tree, tries to discover the true meaning of Christmas. To do it, he'll have to change the outcome of the Vietnam War. Lisa Kudrow provides the voice of the Ghost of Christmas Past. Also includes the voices of Donald Sutherland and Robert De Niro.
"Bush Comes to Dinner"
Guess who's coming to dinner? It's George W. Bush (voice of Dee Bradley Baker). It seems that Stan's essay saluting the president earned him the honor. Not surprisingly, Hayley doesn't think it's so great, but Roger goes out of his way to make W. feel comfortable. Roger also wants to buy the Dollywood theme park and has a plan to raise the asking price: He's going to capture Osama bin Laden to win the reward that goes with it.
"American Dream Factory"
Stan turns entrepreneur and opens a teddy-bear factory staffed by illegal aliens. Of course, Hayley is appalled and takes action.
"A.T. the Abusive Terrestrial"
After Steve tells Roger that he has outgrown him, Roger hooks up with a 9-year-old (voice of Patton Oswalt) who wants an E.T.-type alien of his own. And Stan and Francine go crazy when they learn that their favorite soft drink is being discontinued.
"Black Mystery Month"
Steve becomes embroiled in a murderous conspiracy involving George Washington Carver while researching a Black History Month school paper on Carver.
"Apocalypse to Remember"
Stan mistakes a CIA nuclear war drill for the real thing and rushes his family to a mountain retreat to ride out the apocalypse. Then, when he finds out the truth, he doesn't tell anyone because he's having such a good time.
"Four Little Words"
Stan plays matchmaker for Bullock (voice of Patrick Stewart) and a friend of Francine's, then gets everyone drunk so the evening will go well. Bad move.
"When a Stan Loves a Woman"
Francine divorces Stan in order to rekindle their romance. She wants him to see what life is like for a bachelor. Meanwhile, Steve becomes addicted to an energy drink, and begs for money in the street to support his habit.
"I Can't Stan You"
Stan brings home CIA equipment to eavesdrop on his neighbors so he can find out what they think of him. He gets an earful, and a battle ensues.
"Magnificent Steven"
Stan gets caught sending contaminated cattle to the slaughterhouse. The reason he did it, he says, was to make Steve "a man." Meanwhile, Roger's favoritism leads to a fight between Francine and Hayley. Carnie Wilson has a voice cameo as a cashier.
"Joint Custody"
Bounty hunters Roger and Stan chase Hayley's boyfriend, who is wanted for smuggling marijuana, across the country. And Steve is in for a shock when he tries to hot-wire Francine's car.
"Big Trouble in Little Langley"
When Francine's adopted parents stop by for an unannounced stay, Stan is furious that they refuse to assimilate to his "man of the house" ways. After he unsuccessfully tries to give them the boot, he is convinced that finding Francine’s birth parents will change things. Meanwhile, Steve tries to live to the extreme in order to get to second base with the class hottie.
"Haylias"
When Hayley decides to move to France because of imperialistic oppression, Stan will do anything to stop her including revealing the fact that she was brainwashed as a child by the CIA. Feeling desperate, Stan activates her trigger word and gains control over Hayley against the advice of his boss, Bullock (Patrick Stewart). Everything is going fine until Stan remembers that if he doesn't change Hayley back to normal, there will be deadly consequences for him. Meanwhile, Steve and Roger become private Dick Tracys.
